What Growing Up Really Feels Like (And Why It Hits You in Your 30s)

A Reflection on Life, Dreams, and the Moments That Shape Us

If I could pick any song that sums up my life right now, it would be “Miss Independent“ by Kelly Clarkson. I vividly remember hearing that song on the radio when I was younger — thinking it was the best thing ever (I would have been age 10 – 12 at the time). It brings me back to a time when I was still in school, unaware of what awaited me beyond the pasty white classroom walls.

Looking back, I’d say my second life anthem would have to be “Breakaway,” also by Kelly Clarkson. I always couldn’t wait to leave my hometown. Even when I was younger, always thinking about how one day I would leave and travel the world. I just always felt that it was a little small for me. That there was and still is a lot more out there to be explored instead of staying in the same place I grew up, and what I would describe as a fishbowl compared to the big wide ocean. From the moment I graduated from University, I couldn’t wait to leave my hometown. Within a few months from that date, I was literally on a plane to London, UK — wide-eyed, heart full of dreams, and ready to take on the world.

When you’re young — in your early or even late twenties — you carry this incredible sparkle.
There’s a magic in being a little naive, a little too optimistic. You haven’t yet been too bruised or discouraged by the world around you. You step into life believing in endless possibilities, thinking everyone is as kind-hearted and as open as you are.

When Life Starts to Change

But in my experience life, as it tends to do, teaches you differently.
Sometimes it’s by our own doing, sometimes it’s the wrong place at the wrong time, and sometimes it’s by others sadly. We fall. We learn to dust ourselves off. We stand back up. And occasionally, we get knocked down again. Along the way, something inside us changes.
Your skin gets a little thicker. You become a little less naive, a little more worldly.
You start to understand that not everyone will have your best interests at heart — because they’re busy chasing their own dreams, their own agendas, and sometimes you are just in the way and become collateral damage (even though they never meant to hurt you).

And one day, you wake up and wonder – where did the time go?
It’s not that you didn’t have good times — you did. It’s just that time moved so quickly.
One minute you’re wishing away the school years, desperate to start “real life.” The next, you’re in your 20s, then your 30s — and you catch yourself dreaming that time could just slow down for a mere moment.

I guess what I’m really getting at is this – When was the last time you took a step back and really thought about what you want?

When was the last time you hit pause — did a self-assessment — and asked yourself that critical, soul-level question?

It’s never too late to ask.
And, it’s never too late to start again.

If you are seeking some direction, you might also like – New Year, New Beginnings: Reflect, Reset, and Reimagine Your Path for 2025.